Lessons From Doggy Day Care

It has been a week since I left my past job as a kennel assistant at a Doggy Day care. During my time there, I have learned many things that still stick out in my mind.

One of them is the fact that these doggy day cares are often used as safe places. Owners come in and drop the dog off to board for a week. Then once the owner leaves, they cancel their credit card and never look back. Unfortunately, I never had the opportunity to actually see this happen. Apparently this kind of stuff is common.

Another lesson is that when you put dogs together in a room, it can drive the biggest of dog lovers to think about snapping the neck of that goddamn basset hound THAT WON’T. SHUT. UP. For those that think that I am a monster by saying that, you haven’t worked at one of these places. You try to stay collected with dogs constantly shitting, pissing and humping each other. By the second week I began to understand why some cultures eat dogs. A dog can feed a family for a week depending on the breed. Also, how great would it be to have a pair of husky socks?

However, in my entire time working at the place, there is one lesson that rises to the top. The advice or tip came from a co-worker who said, “If the dogs are fighting and you cannot pull them apart, stick you finger in one of their butts. They’ll stop right away.”

Wow. Yes it’s disgusting. Then again, the logic is sound. I can’t imagine a dog or anyone continuing what they were doing if suddenly a finger became lodged in their anus. And I began to think…

For starters, there would have been a lot less messing around in high school if teachers used this technique to take back the classroom. Good luck trying to cheat on another test after having your math teacher’s thumb plugging you up.

I would go so far to say this disciplinary system should be the gold standard. No more wasting a kid’s time in detention or Saturday school. When I served time on Saturday’s it gave me more time to think how to not get caught, which lead to more trouble down the line.

All I ask is to simply think of what is possible instead of flat-out rejecting my idea. Give it a shot on your wife who just bought a purse that breaks the budget. Give it a shot on the kid that you pulled over for speeding. Or try it if you’re having trouble sticking to your new diet. It if works for dogs, I am sure it will work for humans.

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